24 - Season 6.5 - 3:00 AM to 4:00 AM

“My name is Mike Fister and today is the longest day of my life.”

The following DID NOT take place between 3:00 AM and 4:00 AM in the office of Cadence CEO Michael Fister. Mike has called his executive staff together for an emergency meeting. In the room are Kevin Bushby,  Jim Miller, Bill Porter and R.L. McKeithen. Mike has not slept for over 24 hours.  He’s clearly agitated, pacing back and forth, eyes darting side to side.

Mike: [Pointing to an article about 3 execs fired at Logic Vision to save cost] Did you see this? Can you believe it?

[Kevin grabs the article, glances at it, laughs, and then passes it to the others]

Kevin: Those fools! How could they not see this coming?

Bill: At least they’ll get a hefty severance package.

Jim: They’ll probably make more money now than before.

[They all laugh, except for Mike, who keeps pacing.]

R.L.: Why are we here Mike? Did you have us come in just to show us this article?

[Mike stops to gather his thoughts]

Mike: They were right!

Jim: Who was?

Mike: The board. They were right to fire those guys.  They made too much money and they didn’t do Jack. They should have fired them a long time ago.

Bill: Hey, they may have made a few mistakes, but who hasn’t?  The board is just making these guys the scapegoats for the poor execution of the rest of the company. It’s just like football … the players screw up so they fire the coach. Kinda like Al Davis firing …

Mike: You guys don’t get it, do you?

R.L. : Mike, if you’ve got something to say, then say it. I’ve got a 6:30 tee time so let’s get this moving. [Laughs]

[R.L. realizes that was not the best thing to say]

R.L: I’m sorry Mike.  What’s this all about?

Mike: It’s over.

[Long pause]

Mike: Do you guys have any idea how much money we make altogether?

[They look around but no answer]

Mike: I added it up. $26,835,304 !!! It makes me sick.

[The others looked at eachother once more, now getting concerned about Mike’s state of mind and what he might do]

Kevin: Mike. Calm down. You’re going to wrinkle your pajamas.

Mike: Do you know how many people’s jobs we could have saved? Over 100!!! Each of them with families.

R. L. : Careful Mike. Someone might think you’re a democrat. [Laughs … then catches himself again]

Mike: This watch.  [Taking off his watch] This watch could have paid for us to fix all those System Verilog bugs in our simulator. [He places the watch carefully on his desk] And my car. [Going over to and looking out the window] My car could have paid for one more SourceLink support engineer. [He takes the keys out and places them next to the watch and then walks back over to the window].

Jim: Mike …

[Mike stares out the window for what seems like an eternity, then takes a deep breath and faces the rest]

Mike: They only made one mistake.  [Silence] They fired those guys instead of having them resign. [Looking at  Jim] You were right Jim, they’ll probably make more now than they did before.

[Mike walks over to the printer to grab a sheet of paper that he had printed out earlier.  He stares at it for about 10 seconds, then looks at the group].

Mike:  Who’s with me on this?

[They look at each other, then, one at a time, they stand up and put their hands together].

R.L. : We’re with you Mike.

Mike: [A tear in his eye] I’ll miss you guys. [He turns and picks up the phone].

Mike Fister and his executive staff resigned that morning.

                        

OK…so I made this up.  This meeting never happened … as far as I know.

It’s a shame though … cuz the part about their salaries paying for 100 jobs is true. Maybe some Cadence employees will get to keep their jobs because of these resignations. Probably not … but maybe.

harry the ASIC guy

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3 Responses to “24 - Season 6.5 - 3:00 AM to 4:00 AM”

  1. danubi1 Says:

    “Mike. Calm down! You’re going to wrinkle your pajamas.”

    That is a classic line. LOL!

    Nice dramatization!

    Kwam

  2. Ron Says:

    Soon to be an EDA classic.

    When’s the movie coming out?

    R~

  3. harry ... the ASIC guy Says:

    A Scalpel or a Hatchet?…

    I spoke to a friend of mine at Cadence yesterday morning.
    “I came in this morning and tried to log on and I couldn’t.  Turns out I must have mistyped my password, but I was worried there for a minute.”
    That seems to sum up the mood …

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